Plenty more fish in the sea

What's your worst nightmare? Being trapped in a lift? Naked in public? Teeth falling out? Mine involved a fish shaped cookie cutter...

I had agreed to make 60 iced fish-shaped cookies for a children's party being organised by two ruthlessly efficient mothers - and lost the cookie cutter at the last possible moment. I put out a plea on Facebook, I sent texts to all my baking friends: no-one had a fish. But salvation comes in the strangest forms - in this case the just-opened 'Cake Kit' (sister shop of Kitchen Kit) in Fleet, who offered a choice of fish or dolphin.

Still looking for Nemo...

The recipe for the dough comes from Annabel Karmel. It's failsafe AND delicious, with a crisp texture and the buttery taste of shortbread. And it's not just for making fish either - roll it into a big fat sausage and cut into slices about half a centimetre thick for boring-but-fast round cookies.

Cookie dough

250g butter - at room temperature

140g caster sugar

1 egg yolk

2 teaspoons vanilla essence

300g plain flour

¼ teaspoon salt

Pre-heat oven to 180/gas 4. Put everything except the flour and salt into a bowl and beat well. Add the flour and salt, then mix again. Press the dough together firmly with your hands, then wrap it in clingfilm and put it in the fridge for 30 minutes. When you get it out, cut into 2 or 3 chunks, and work with one at a time (smaller volume = easier to handle), bringing all the scrappy bits together at the end. Using plenty of flour, roll it out, cut into shapes about half a centimetre thick and bake for 10-15 minutes until light golden brown. And don't have nightmares...

Naked fish

Chocolate chip shortbread

It's going to be a lovely day tomorrow. Really. So do your time in the kitchen today and be ready to get outdoors when the sun starts shining.

Whatever the weather, these chocolate chip shortbread rounds will not disappoint. Crisp, crunchy, buttery shortbread with chunks of dark and white chocolate (such as left-over Easter eggs). You could even go wild and add a handful of nuts.

Just add tea

Chocolate chip shortbread

225g butter

100g caster sugar

¼ teaspoon salt (if you're using unsalted butter; a generous pinch if not)

225g plain flour

½ teaspoon baking powder

125g chocolate (any type), chopped

Pre-heat oven to 150/gas 2. Cream the butter and sugar together until pale and fluffy. Add the flour, baking powder and chocolate and stir to form a stiff dough. Roll into walnut-sized rounds, flatten each one slightly and place on a baking tray at least 3cm apart. Bake for approximately 20 minutes until light golden brown. Remove from baking tray and cool on a rack.

You say "burger", I say "steak haché"

Iced ginger biscuits

Further inspired by my trip across La Manche, I decided to re-create steak haché (our French friends' answer to the turkey twizzler). Mince was not sold in France until relatively recently, as the consumer preferred to pick out a piece of meat themselves and watch the butcher mince it. A canny way to avoid the accidental ingestion of cows' lips and other rubbery bits. 

Steak Haché

I bought 500g of lean minced beef, tipped it into a bowl and added a generous amount of seasoning. I then squished it all together wearing my best Marigolds, formed it into 4 patties and fried them for a few minutes on each side. Served with sugar snap peas, broccoli and oven chips.My steaks were rather thick and inelegant (and looked like burgers, I admit). Try and make yours as thin as possible.

Steak haché frites

Iced Ginger Biscuits

For pudding, we ate some iced ginger biscuits made by child 2. 

12oz plain flour

2 teaspoons ground ginger

4oz butter

1 teaspoon bicarbonate of soda
6oz soft light brown sugar

1 egg

4 tablespoons golden syrup (warm it gently for ease of handling)

Heat oven to 190/gas 5. Put butter, flour, ginger and bicarb in a food processor and whizz until it reaches the breadcrumbs stage. Add sugar and whizz again for a few seconds. Beat the egg and golden syrup together in a separate bowl, and add them to the dry stuff. Whizz yet again until it forms a dough. Roll the dough to about 5mm thick and cut out as many shapes as you can. Bake for 10-15 minutes, depending on how large your biscuits are. Leave to cool and decorate with tubes of writing icing.